{"id":1514,"date":"2020-05-13T04:51:17","date_gmt":"2020-05-13T04:51:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/copebetter.com\/?p=1514"},"modified":"2020-05-13T05:03:01","modified_gmt":"2020-05-13T05:03:01","slug":"10-ways-to-cope-with-intense-emotions-during-the-coronavirus-crisis","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/copebetter.com\/10-ways-to-cope-with-intense-emotions-during-the-coronavirus-crisis\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Ways to Cope With Intense Emotions During the Coronavirus Crisis"},"content":{"rendered":"
Photograph courtesy of Getty Images.<\/em><\/p>\n Article originally appeared in Philadelphia Magazine at\u00a0<\/i>https:\/\/www.phillymag.com\/be-well-philly\/2020\/05\/11\/coronavirus-coping-strategies\/<\/a> published on\u00a0May 11, 2020\u00a0\u2013 By <\/i>Laura Brzyski<\/i><\/a><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Local grief and anger management counselors weigh in on how to sit with all your coronavirus feelings without lashing out.<\/p>\n These past two months have dredged up a LOT of feelings for many folks. The collective experience of this pandemic has been overwhelming, and it takes a ton of emotional energy to process all the transitions, changes, and losses. With so much out of our control, it can feel as though coronavirus has us moving through the five stages of grief \u2014 denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance \u2014 on a daily basis.<\/p>\n To help you navigate whatever you may be feeling, we turned to local grief and anger management counselors for their 10 go-to coping tips. That way, you can better sit with \u2014 and get through \u2014 your sadness or anger, in order to bring more joy back into your life.<\/p>\n Eric Spiegel, licensed psychologist and practice director at\u00a0Attune Philadelphia Therapy Group<\/a>, reminds us that losses come in all shapes and sizes. \u201cWe often think of loss as having to do with death,\u201d he says, \u201cbut loss can also be about the death of what we have had to give up, like a wedding, graduation, or other life milestone.\u201d The first step to processing your emotions, he says, is to put words to what you\u2019re feeling, and give yourself permission to acknowledge and accept what you\u2019ve lost, no matter what it may be.<\/p>\n This can be tough for some, though, especially if you feel like your loss isn\u2019t as \u201cbad\u201d as someone else\u2019s or you don\u2019t want to admit vulnerability. Alisa Kamis-Brinda, owner of\u00a0Serenity Solutions<\/a>, says practicing acceptance helps us understand that this isn\u2019t a competition; all loss is valid, and therefore, all grief is valid. Additionally, not accepting our painful emotions is similar to not scratching an itch: it\u2019ll continue to bug us if we continue to dwell on it or don\u2019t do something about it.<\/p>\n Right now, it might seem like so much is out of our control, which can make us feel angry, sad, or defeated. Lori O\u2019Mara, owner of\u00a0Cope Better Therapy<\/a>, suggests we reframe our thinking by taking control of our daily lives through a routine. \u201cAnxious brains want a plan and depressed brains need a plan,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen anxious thoughts creep in, bring yourself back to the present moment and focus on the tasks at hand. When depressive feelings arise, make a schedule and commit to it.\u201d A routine can increase your sense of autonomy during a time when many things feel uncontrollable.<\/p>\n Looking for the good within the bad right now won\u2019t bring back to life anyone who has died, nor will it make a job loss suddenly reappear. It can, however, help rearrange our values and how we spend our time and energy going forward. Clinical psychologist\u00a0Walter J. Matweychuk<\/a>\u00a0believes searching for the good can help us carry on, despite any significant loss we may have suffered. \u201cThere can be something useful in the timeout imposed on our busy lives, like bringing into focus what truly matters, reconnecting with loved ones even from afar, and having a greater appreciation for human life and the ecosystem,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n Beth Jellinek<\/a>, licensed professional counselor, reminds us that self-care practices include attention to wellness, like getting good rest, exercise, a nutritious diet, a spiritual practice if you have one, as well as connecting to nature and nurturing relationships. However, it can also look like setting and maintaining boundaries, which may be necessary in terms of productively managing your negative emotions. \u201cRight now, many of us are being asked to do more than our usual full plates can handle,\u201d she says. \u201cIt\u2019s worth knowing what things you can let go of or say no to, and when you need to reach out for help.\u201d In terms of anger and grief specifically, Jellinek recommends limiting your news intake in order to preserve your emotional reserve.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re the kind of person who can\u2019t stand to sit still, then release pent-up energy and emotions through exercise. Spiegel says feeling your body in motion via physical activity can actually help you like you\u2019re making progress mentally and emotionally. Running, biking, jumping rope, taking a barre class, and practicing yoga can be \u201cways of finding yourself through your body when you may feel lost, angry, or upset,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n Similar to creating a routine, setting a daily intention can benefit your emotional health because it literally forces you to check in with your feelings (aka mindfulness!). Licensed professional counselor\u00a0Elise Gaul<\/a>\u00a0says your intention and the subsequent choices you make should support how you want to feel that day. \u201cIf I need to be calm and present, I probably don\u2019t want to start the day reading the news,\u201d she says. \u201cIf I need energy and endurance, then I may need to move my body and eat something that will help with that.\u201d Doing so can help us tune in to what we need in the moment and to \u201cfeel our feelings\u201d as they arise, so that we can do our best to not take out our stress on others and hold space for joy and empathy.<\/p>\n So many aspects of life currently don\u2019t look or feel \u201cnormal,\u201d and we\u2019ve had to shift how we approach work, school, relationships, and even death. Kamis-Brinda reminds us that flexibility is an important coping skill, as it allows us to be open to change. \u201cEven though we can\u2019t see friends or family in person when we want to, we can be flexible and schedule video calls, virtual dinners, or game nights with them,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n Additionally, O\u2019Mara says finding ways to adapt through life events reminds us of our strength and capability. If you can\u2019t Zoom a family member, snailmail them a handwritten letter or piece of art as a way to remind them you\u2019re thinking of them. If you\u2019re grieving the loss of a loved one right now and unable to attend a funeral or service, she says you can pay your respects in a less traditional way, like watching their favorite movie, planting flowers in their honor, or donating to a charity that meant something to them.<\/p>\n Spiegel says one of the most important qualities of resilience and\u00a0post-traumatic growth<\/a>\u00a0is reframing a loss as an opportunity, though reframing doesn\u2019t mean denying the loss. \u201cWe need to face our losses and be present with them in order to heal, as well as welcome the possibility that we can grow from facing this setback,\u201d he says. Instead of fearing who or what we are losing, Spiegel suggests asking yourself, \u201cWhat do I want to learn from my pain?\u201d or \u201cWhat is my pain teaching me?\u201d When we turn to face our sadness, pain, or fear, eventually what felt unbearable might end up feeling tolerable, and you\u2019ll have a better chance at discovering something positive about ourselves that we hadn\u2019t yet recognized.<\/p>\n O\u2019Mara says reminding yourself that we are all experiencing this pandemic together, albeit in different ways, can help decrease feelings of loneliness and isolation, as well as a mindset that you\u2019re the only person dealing with hardship. Tapping into your community and doing your part can help us get through this together.<\/p>\n All of our experts agree that therapy can often help you get to the heart of your emotions and develop coping strategies specific to your needs. Gaul says therapy is especially beneficial right now because uncharted territory typically provokes anxiety, which can then lead to a sense of helplessness or depression. For a list of virtual mental health services in the Philly area, head\u00a0here<\/a>.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Photograph courtesy of Getty Images. Article originally appeared in Philadelphia Magazine at\u00a0https:\/\/www.phillymag.com\/be-well-philly\/2020\/05\/11\/coronavirus-coping-strategies\/ published on\u00a0May 11, 2020\u00a0\u2013 By Laura Brzyski Local grief and anger management counselors weigh in on how to sit with all your coronavirus feelings without lashing out. These past two months have dredged up a LOT of feelings for many folks. The…<\/p>\nAcknowledge and validate your loss, no matter what it is.<\/h3>\n
Focus on what\u2019s in your control.<\/h3>\n
Look for the good within and despite the bad.<\/h3>\n
Practice self-care.<\/h3>\n
Move your muscles.<\/h3>\n
Start every day with an intention.<\/h3>\n
Adapt where you can.<\/h3>\n
Reframe loss as an opportunity.<\/h3>\n
Remember you are not alone.<\/h3>\n
Consider talking with a therapist.<\/h3>\n